It's a beautiful day...

I've been awake less that two hours and I've already lost faith in this day being any kind of success. I got up feeling pants but thought I'd probably feel better if I had dinner so I made dinner (that sounds more accomplished than it was; I microwaved dinner) and then managed to throw it all over myself, my bed and my BlackBerry. So dinner was nachos and coffee, I have to change the bed sheets and I have like, third degree burns because, turns out, chicken fricassee is HOTTER THAN THE SUN. If my BlackBerry stops working I'm just going to leap right over the line and go insane.

Yesterday wasn't any better; in fact, I'd go as far as to say it was worse. This medication needs to get its arse in gear because there are fifteen days until I need to return to work and hit the ground running and that involves being able to get out of bed. I'm worrying that this isn't the withdrawal or the new meds or any of that, that this is just me. Scary thought.

There's stuff I am trying to get my head around at the moment to do with needing other people. My opinion is that I shouldn't, my therapist's opinion is that I should and my Christian friends' opinion seems to be that I should but not as much as I need Jesus. That clears that up then, because Jesus seems to be MIA right about now. I feel like there's some magic formula to being a Christian that I've not found yet.

My head feels like it's going to explode.